Last day of Chanukah

Today, the last day of Chanukah, I finally received the candles I ordered. I felt bittersweet as I said the prayer over them. This Chanukah has gone by so quickly, as everything goes by so quickly...

Anyway, when I lit the shamus (the candle in the middle of the menorah), it didn't seem to be lit up very much. The flame was very small, almost like turning on a laser pointer. I picked up the shamus and lit the rest of the candles. When I put it back, the flame seemed much bigger, as if it had gathered strength from feeding all the other candles with itself.

This Chanukah week has been an eventful week in many ways. I've recommitted myself to my writing... I just came to the point when I realized that I know I'm going to be a writer. It's not a matter of if I get published, it's a matter of when. (Although I am breaking one of the rules in my editing book with all these italics! Oh, and with the exclamation point too. Damn.)

So if I'm going to be a writer, why worry about what else I'm doing? I'm doing the best I can to concentrate on my writing. I've been investigating doing some grant writing, too... grants are hard to get because you have to write out your whole budget and write a statement of purpose and all that, but I'm steadily working on it. I want to get a grant to finish, publish, and promote my first novel. In the meantime, I started working on my second.

A writing book I read suggested giving yoruself a page quota and sticking to it every day. I made myself write 5 pages today. The problem is, I don't think they were nearly as good as what I've written in the past, and it became a chore to sit there and get the five pages done. I understand that you need to have discipline to become a writer, but I'm not quite sure this is the way to go.

In the mean time, I got fitted for contact lenses today! I tried this once before, but Dave and I were so disorganized I managed to lose the lenses after spending a fortune on them :( This time I intend for things to be different. I have such nice eyes... how can I hide them behind glasses?

It's hard to get used to wearing these lenses. I see better in them than I do in the old glasses I was wearing. But my brain is used to not seeing properly so it keeps thinking I'm not seeing right because I am seeing right, if that makes any sense.

Anyway, here's a picture of me in my contacts. (I've lost some more weight, too... more about that in a minute)

I had trouble taking a picture of myself...the camera was way too close and kept making me look strange. This is the best I can do.

Anyway, like I said, I lost another 3 pounds, for a total of 21 pounds thus far. I hit my 10% goal last week, which means that I have now lost 10% of my original body weight. It took me 3 months... I'm hoping to lose another 20 lbs over the next 3 months, and then 20 lbs more... six months from now I should have reached my weight goal.

The 10% goal is important because when you lose 10% of your overweight, you greatly reduce the risk of heart disease, cancer, stroke, diabetes, etc. I bought myself a really nice dress at JC Penney's as a reward. Some other time I'll take a picture of myself in it.

Oh yeah, and tonight I'm going to make macaroni and cheese. This is a good Chanukah.